Blood Pressure

Even on bp meds it is not coming down. Just now I took a reading when I woke up, still laying in bed relaxed and the reading was 136/88!

I will do some research to find out which foods are important to lower blood pressure! Of course I would also be to start riding my bicycle again, and the sooner the better!

Pls forgive me for any typos
while replying from my mobile device.

Father's day

It has not been the best for fathers day yet
Hi have a feeling that I'm not the best father to my daughters Because I am unable to provide them with the summer camps and other vacation solutions for the summer!

Pls forgive me for any typos
while replying from my mobile device.

A good reading for father's day

a good reading ...

The beauty of music

it is in music that I recognize the beauty of life
the emotional connection with the notes whether an allegro or an adagio
music has always moves me in ways that nothing else does ...
in music I have found love, pain, sorrow, sadness and joy
As I listen to a piece of music or song with which I have an emotion connection
I often wonder how much emptier my life would be without it

My compulsive eating behavior

My compulsive eating behavior is by far the worst part of me, the part I hate the most about being me ... its bad, real bad! What I need and have asked for is for support however I don't seem to be able to get the support from the family. I admire Micheal for having had the courage and the ability to change his life around 3 years ago resulting in over 100lbs weight loss.
Today was a bad day for me with regards to eating: while driving home from the warehouse I asked the girls who wanted a milkshake and decided to stop at a diner famous for their peanut butter shakes. I opted for a chocolate while the girls opted for other flavors. By the time we got home, I was done and the girls had about 1/2 left each. They asked me if I wanted to finish their shakes as they were full - I said yes and cleaned both cups out.
Now I am here hating myself for having done so, for not having the will power to say no ...
If I just could figure out where this eating behavior originates and what I can do to control it I would be a happier person.

Great Radio Program - KQED Forum

While driving to pick-up the girls today I listened to a program on KQED Forum called Financial Planning Update. The program was extremely interesting sharing different points on view on how to best manage money. Many of the callers topics were about paying for children's higher/college education. After listening to several callers and the panel responding, I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders ... I realized that I had done very little to prepare for Chiara's and Bianca's college education. Am I a bad father by not being able to save money for their education. Chiara is going to go to college in 7 years and just the thought of needing to make up a college fund just adds more stress to everything that is already going on.

Her's the start ...

I registered for this blog well over 6 months ago in order to chronicle my recovery from an emotionally and physically unbalanced life.

Here are some of the goals I need to set for myself as a person in an attempt to become a better person:

1. Spend more quality time with the family

2. Spend time taking care of myself

3. Create a plan for the children's future schooling

4. Create a plan towards retirement

5. Create a plan that will bring happiness into my life

6. Become better organized

Its a long list and there is a lot of pressure on me by me.